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Tuesday, August 3rd, 2004
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What's your name? - Boobies
Birthplace - Greenville, NC
Age - 21
Age you act - depends on my mood
Current location - Jacksonville
Eye color - Brown
Hair color - a mix of dirty blonde, red, and light brown.
Right, lefty or ambidextrous? - Ambidextrous if i'm drawing and right if i'm writing
Zodiac sign? - Cancer
Height? - 5'7"
Describe
Your heritage/nationality - Irish, German, Swiss, English, etc etc...
Your fears - loss, abandonment
Your perfect room - dunno...i like the one i have at the moment...but i'd rather have hardwood floors and maybe blue, red, or black walls
What you practically do in a day - play taxi cab with a car that's not mine...work...and play bitch to my girl
What is/are
Words you overuse - um and huh
Phrases you overuse - i dunno
Your first thought when you wake up - what time is it? which is immediately followed by just 5 more minutes
Your greatest accomplishment - Keeping this job for so damn long
Something you want to do - get a car and pimp it out
This or that
Pepsi or Coke - coke
McDonald's or Burger Kings - mcdonalds
Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera - Britney spears of course
Chocolate or vanilla - Chocolate
Adidas or Nike - Adidas
Black or white - Black
Bills or Coins - Bills
Burgers or hot dogs - CHEESE burgers
Egypt or France - Egypt
Rock or rap - Rap unless i'm upset about something
Do you
Smoke - yes
Cuss - all the time
Sing well - when no one is around
Sing in the shower - sometimes
Talk to yourself - yep
Believe in yourself - sometimes...
Like taking these long ass surveys? - only when i'm bored
Play an instrument - used to
Want to go to college? - maybe
Want to get married? - maybe one day
Want to have children? - already kinda have one...but yeah one day
Think you're a health freak? - hell no
Get along with your parents - yeah
Get along with your siblings? - yep...my brother loves me
Think you're popular - nope
In the past month have you
Gone out of state - yes
Smoked - yes
Gotten high - ::grin::
Done any drugs - see above
Eaten an entire box of oreos - yep...not in one sitting though
Been on stage - can't say i have
Been skinny dipping: nope
Been dumped - nope
Dyed your hair - nope
Stolen anything - nope
The Last
Last dream - last dream i remember was angelicas face fading in, her smiling, and then her fading out.
Last nightmare - had to do with my cat and then i was swallowed by the earth and angelica was too busy to help me...
Car ride - everyday
Last time you cried - yesterday
Last movie seen - Nemo
Last movie rented - Monster
Last book read - dean koontz...don't remember which one though it was awhile ago.
Last word said - yep
Last curse word said - shit
Last time you laughed - when i went on break
Last phone call - Brynn Marr jewelers called to tell me that my bracelet is ready...that was on my cell but i missed the call...but technically the last call i took was a friedmans call cuz i'm at work.
Last CD played - a mixed cd
Last song you listened to - Kevin Lyttle- call me
Last annoyance - waiting for someone to get out of a meeting so i could go on break
Last IM - Jones is the only person i talk to on IM
Last weird encounter - ::shrug::
Last person you hugged - angelica in the shower this morning
Last person you yelled at - Sam
Last time you wore a skirt - ::blank stare:: i dunno...i think i was still in chicago when i last wore one
Last time you've been evil - its been a couple months...
Sarcastic? - everyday
Last time you fought with your parents - beats the hell out of me...its been awhile
Last time you wished upon a star - i don't usually wish on stars anymore...i wished on one of angelica's eyelashes when we were in the shower
Played Truth or Dare - in chicago, but i think all we played was truth
Spent quality time alone - dunno.
Randomness
Are you talking to someone on AIM - nope
Do you feel lonely - sometimes
Ever TP'd someone's house - can't say that i have
How about egging someone's house - can't say that i have
Ever been so hungry you felt like you could eat the person next to you? - only when angelica is around...::grin::
What do you think of George Bush? - grr
Any secret fetishes? - sure but i'm not sure how to describe them.
Do you like to wear chains? - used to...not really now...although i have one on my wrist
How many languages do you speak? - one but i understand spanish, but cant speak it.
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............................my cat died..............................
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DANIELLE HAD HER BABY!!!!
Jadaye Dominique Trent was born on June 5, 2004 at 11:35 am.
Weight: 5.9
Height: 18 inches
She went through 7 hours of labor. She was rushed to the hospital. 10 minutes after she had the baby.
This just made my day. ::CHEESES::
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Today makes the 3 year mark for this damn journal thing...i just now noticed it. so yeah...just thought i'd post just because...
I'm sad...
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| Time: | 8:09 pm. |
| Mood: |  sick. | | Music: | none i'm on a call.... |
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1: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, find line 4. Write down what it says: I'm at work...there's no books near me...
2: Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What do you touch first?: the side of the cubicle
3: What is the last thing you watched on TV?: um. it was a cartoon cuz gabriel was watching it...um...ed edd and eddie
4: WITHOUT LOOKING, guess what the time is: 8:00pm
5: Now look at the clock, what is the actual time?: 8:06 on my watch, 8:04 on my phone, 8:11 on the computer, and 8:04 on aspect.
6: With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?: Music; Usher-Burn and my co workers typing and clicking of mouse
7: When did you last step outside? what were you doing?: about an hour ago and i was walking into the buidling from my lunch.
8: Before you came to this website, what did you look at?: I was playing gams at yahoo.
9: What are you wearing?: Jnco Jeans, A striped south pole fuzzy polo like shirt, and my blue shoes.
10: Did you dream last night?: yes
11: When did you last laugh?: a few minutes ago. ken told me to stop sniffing and giving him puppy dog eyes...(i'm sick and i want to go home but i can't)
12: What is on the walls of the room you are in?: There used to be all kinds of shit on these walls but they just recently took it all down so they could repaint the walls.
13: Seen anything weird lately?: no not really. same ol same ol
14: What do you think of this quiz?: gives me something to do for a few moments...
15: What is the last film you saw?: I watched Warlock 2 the ther day...
16: If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy first?: Car
17: Tell me something about you that I don't know: i'm not wearing any underwear...ha...
18: If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?: um...i dunno...equal rights or some shit like that for EVERYONE or poverty
19: Do you like to dance?: yeah
20: George Bush: ugh...
21: Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?: I haven't decided on the spelling but its gonna be like Ahleighle, Alile, Aleighle, Ahleighlay, Alilay, etc...
21: Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?: Agony...no i dunno...Ashton, man i dunno...
22: Would you ever consider living abroad?: maybe
23: Name the one person you miss the most: Can't just name one...Danielle, Nicole Craig, and my baby...
24: What is the one thing you should be doing right now?: my job...but i'm sick and they won't let me go home so i'm only answering the phone and fucking around otherwise...
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Wednesday, November 12th, 2003
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You took me from sadness
Pieced together the shattered mess left from those before
and no words could ever express my gratitude
No actions could ever show it
I do not want to hurt you
but i cannot give you that promise
I will not give you that promise
For it would only be a lie
it is something that cannot be guarenteed
I want to give you the world
but I don't have much
I can only really offer my love
and hope that it is enough
I want to be who you go to when you are in need
i will always try to make you smile
in ways that you know only i can
I'll bring light to your darkness
and kiss away your tears
I have found something in you
a something that draws me closer
it pulls me in like an unknown force that can't denied
as the days pass i want you more
i crave your touch, your kiss
I yearn for your eyes to lock on mine
it is then my world seems whole
You have been my friend
You are now my girl
One day, could you be my love?
I'm afraid of what i could feel
I'm afraid you could never be mine
I don't want to lose you
and honestly, i don't want to share
But for you, I will
even knowing the pain i will feel
what we will share is something I can't walk away from
Doing so would hurt much more
You've given me so much
much more than i could have ever asked for
You've given me reason
And I appreciate everything you are
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Tuesday, November 11th, 2003
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i'm so tired of being here
suppressed by all my childish fears
and if you have to leave
i wish that you would just leave
'cause your presence still lingers here
and it won't leave me alone
these wounds won't seem to heal
this pain is just too real
there's just too much that time cannot erase
[chorus]
when you cried i'd wipe away all of your tears
when you'd scream i'd fight away all of your fears
i held your hand through all of these years
but you still have
all of me
you used to captivate me
by your resonating life
now i'm bound by the life you left behind
your face it haunts
my once pleasant dreams
your voice it chased away
all the sanity in me
these wounds won't seem to heal
this pain is just too real
there's just too much that time cannot erase
[chorus]
i've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
but though you're still with me
i've been alone all along
[chorus]
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Friday, August 22nd, 2003
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i've given all i could give
to you, to her, to them
why can't i find someone
who actually appreciates what i do
what i give
the blood, sweat, and tears i put in everything
pieces of me in it all
leaving me in a broken mess
the art i gave
the food i cooked
i poured my soul into it
the laughter i gave
the time we shared
i poured my soul into it
you all took these things as your own
took the joy from it
and never gave anything back in appreciation
each one of you has ripped a hole in me
everytime the wind blows
it blows right through me
causing me pain
i take none of it back
you've all stolen something
each of you has a piece of me
that i can never get back
you've made me into nothing
which is how you've always seen me
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*. . .Would You Rather. . .*
1) Pierce your nose or tongue? well...i went into a piercing shop to get my tongue done...but i found out that i cant pierce my tongue because theres no way to not puncture an artery...so i pierced my nose instead...
2) Be serious or be funny? seriously funny
3) Drink whole or skim milk? ::shrug:: depends on where i live at and what the other people there drink
* . . .Are You. . .*
4) Simple or complicated? complicated as fuck
* . . . Do You Prefer. . . *
5) Flowers or angels? hmm...flowers
6) Grey or gray? ::thinks a moment:: i use both
7) Color or black-and-white photos? they both have their own special thing about them.
8) Lust or love? lust is fun...but love is truly amazing
9) Sunrise or sunset? sunset
10) M&Ms or Skittles? taste the rainbow ;)
11) Rap or rock? rap mostly but rock as well
12) Staying up late or waking up early? staying up late
15) Eating apples or oranges? can't i have both?
* . . .Answer Truthfully. . . *
16) Do you have a crush? always
17) Who is it? britney spears :Þ
* . . .Do You Prefer. . . *
18) Being hot or cold? i think i'd rather be cold as long as i have a blanket.
19) Tall members of the opposite sex? it don't matter
20) Sun or moon? the moon of course. its my ruling planet
21) Emeralds or rubies? rubies...birthstone and all
23) Having 10 acquaintances or 1 best friend? 1 best friend
24) Sun or rain? nothing is more peaceful, spiritual, and sexual than rain
25) Vanilla ice cream or chocolate ice cream? ick
26) Boys or girls? um...let me think a sec...um...um...um...duh both
27) Green beans or carrots? me loves some greenbeans
* . . .Miscellaneous. . . *
29) What is your biggest fear in the world? losing the people i love
30) Kids or no kids? kids
31) Cat or dog? cat
32) Half empty or half full? half full normally
33) Mustard or ketchup? ketchup
34) Hard cover books or soft cover books? what's it matter?
35) Newspaper or magazine? magazines
36) Sandals or sneakers? how bout no shoes
37) Wonder or amazement? Amazement
38) Red car or white car? how bout neither...but i have a white car but wouldn't be caught dead driving a red one...i haev a huge thing about red cars
39) Happy and poor or sad and rich? well i am poor...but i'm not happy...dammit where's my happiness...
40) Singing or dancing? ::shakes her booty:: dancing of course
41) Hugging or kissing? they are both very great
42) Corduroy or plain? ::shrug::
43) Happy or sad? tough question...um i'd rather be sad...(note the sarcasm)
44) Purple or green? green but that's cuz my granny purpled me out
45) Blondes, brunettes? it is very rare that i am attracted to a blonde...so i say brunette...
* . . . About You . . . *
What time is it? 11:32pm
Full name? Shannon Arline
Nicknames: Pookie, Nannon, salmon...yeah something like that
Names and ages of siblings? Tyler-7 on the 1st of august
Number of candles that appeared on your last birthday cake? my cake didn't have candles...but then i dont like cake...but there would have been 20
Date that you regularly blow them out? July 3rd
Pets? i have a cat named friskie...but tyler has a dog named brittany
Height? 5'7"
Eye color? brown
Hair color? naturally i have no idea...currently...i have no idea...its like um red, blond, and brown all mixed but very natural looking...most people like this current color(s)
Piercing(s)? 6 in each ear: three on the bottom of both ears, three at the top of my right ear, two at the top of my left ear, and one between the top and bottom of my right ear. my belly button is pierced and so is my nose. soon my labret and possibly eyebrow
* . . . What Do You Want . . . *
Where do you want to live? near a big city
How many kids do you want? two or maybe three but no more
What kind of job do you want? something i enjoy...something where i can have piercings and tattoos and not have to quit or get fired because of them...i'm thinking about going to bartending school...and then maybe look into being a massuese or however that's spelt...
Do you want to get married? i just want someone in my life that i can count on...marriage is not important
* . . .Which Is Better. . . *
2 doors or 4 (on a car): 4 but that's only cuz ihate getting out of the car to let the people behind you out.
Coffee or ice cream?: coffee
Shampoo or conditioner? both is good
Bridges or tunnels? i like em both
One pillow or two? two
* . . .Word Association. . . *
Rock? and roll
Green? hehe tree
Crying? everyday thang
Peanut? a pet or pet name for someone
Roses? danielle
Summer? hot
Winter? chicago
* . . .Favorites. . . *
Salad dressing? ranch
Color of socks? white
Food? potatoes, broccoli, cereal, um...yep that'll do
Toothbrush? i really like the tooth brush i have now but everytime i brush my teeth i think of danielle...cuz she gave it to me and has one just like it.
Alcoholic drink? i like hard stuff...but um...beer wise i like bud or mgd...um...any type of liquor but i like some femine drinks...i like blasters...
Non-alcoholic drink? juice or kool-aid
Character? bastian and atreyu oh and the childlike empress...she's the shit...um...yep...
* . . .Random Questions. . *.
When was your last hospital check-in? hospital...last time i was in the hospital...um...i think i was born
Where do you see yourself in 10 years? i have no idea...i just hope i'm happy and that i've learned and grown into something that i can still be proud of...
Have you ever been convicted of a crime? nope
What do you do most often when you are bored? think...sleep...watch movies
Name the person that you are friends with that lives the farthest away from you? well my homey just moved to florida...but then theres all them people in PA and them few in Chicago...
Are you open minded? last i checked
Can you be in love with two people at the same time? yes you can be in love with two people at the same time but its not the same...like i was once in love with this one chick...but in love with a friend of mine too...but it wasn't like sexual..i was in love with her as a person but the standard in love with this other chick.
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| sellingnitemare | | Magic Number | 10 | | Job | Sporting Great | | Personality | Drifter | | Temperament | Best Not To Ask | | Sexual | Gay | | Likely To Win | The Booker Prize | | Me - In A Word | Compassionate | | Colour | | | Brought to you by MemeJack |
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| Time: | 2:07 pm. |
| Mood: |  crushed. | | Music: | dr kirtland on the phone. |
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for any of you who care...i may be returning to North Carolina soon...for good...and i am not happy about this at all...life is very fucked up...
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| Time: | 9:19 am. |
| Mood: | crushed. | | Music: | the hum of the computer's fan. |
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How could you?
When I was a puppy, I entertained you with my antics and made you laugh. You called me your child, and despite a number of chewed shoes and a couple of murdered throw pillows, I became your best friend. Whenever I was "bad," you'd shake your finger at me and ask "How could you?"-but then you'd relent and roll me over for a belly rub.
My housebreaking took a little longer than expected, because you were terribly busy, but we worked on that together. I remember those nights of nuzzling you in bed and listening to your confidences and secret dreams, and I believed that life could not be any more perfect.
We went for long walks and runs in the park, car rides, stops for ice cream (I only got the cone because "ice cream is bad for dogs" you said), and I took long naps in the sun waiting for you to come home at the end of the day.
Gradually, you began spending more time at work and on your career, and more time searching for a human mate. I waited for you patiently, comforted you through heartbreaks and disappointments, never chided you about bad decisions, and romped with glee at your homecomings, and when you fell in love. She, now your wife, is not a "dog person", still I welcomed her into our home, tried to show her affection, and obeyed her. I was happy because you were happy.
Then the human babies came along and I shared your excitement. I was fascinated by their pinkness, how they smelled, and I wanted to mother them, too. Only she and you worried that I might hurt them, and I spent most of my time banished to another room, or to a dog crate. Oh, how I wanted to love them, but I became a "prisoner of love." As they began to grow, I became their friend. They clung to my fur and pulled themselves up on wobbly legs, poked fingers in my eyes, investigated my ears, and gave me kisses on my nose. I loved everything about them and their touch-because your touch was now so infrequent-and I would've defended them with my life if need be. I would sneak into their beds and listen to their worries and secret dreams, and together we waited for the sound of your car in the driveway.
There had been a time, when others asked you if you had a dog, that you produced a photo of me from your wallet and told them stories about me. These past few years, you just answered "yes" and changed the subject. I had gone from being "your dog" to "just a dog," and you resented every expenditure on my behalf.
Now, you have a new career opportunity in another city, and you and they will be moving to an apartment that does not allow pets. You've made the right decision for your "family," but there was a time when I was your only family. I was excited about the car ride until we arrived at the animal shelter. It smelled of dogs and cats, of fear, of hopelessness. You filled out the paperwork and said "I know you will find a good home for her." They shrugged and gave you a pained look. They understand the realities facing a middle-aged dog, even one with "papers." You had to pry your son's fingers loose from my collar as he screamed "No, Daddy! Please don'tlet them take my dog!" And I worried for him, and what lessons you had just taught him about friendship and loyalty, about love and responsibility, and about respect for all life.
You gave me a good-bye pat on the head, avoided my eyes, and politely refused to take my collar and leash with you. You had a deadline to meet and now I have one, too. After you left, the two nice ladies said you probably knew about your upcoming move months ago and made no attempt to find me another good home. They shook their heads and asked "How could you?" They are as attentive to us here in the shelter as their busy schedules allow. They feed us, of course, but I lost my appetite days ago. At first, whenever anyone passed my pen, I rushed to the front, hoping it was you that you had changed your mind-that this was all a bad dream...or I hoped it would at least be someone who cared, anyone who might save me. When I realized I could not compete with the frolicking for attention of happy puppies, oblivious to their own fate, I retreated to a far corner and waited. I heard her footsteps as she came for me at the end of the day, and I padded along the aisle after her to a separate room. A blissfully quiet room. She placed me on the table and rubbed my ears, and told me not to worry. My heart pounded in anticipation of what was to come, but there was also a sense of relief. As is my nature, I was more concerned about her. The burden which she bears weighs heavily on her, and I know that, the same way I knew your every mood. She gently placed a tourniquet around my foreleg as a tear ran down her cheek. I licked her hand in the same way I used to comfort you so many years ago. She expertly slid the hypodermic needle into my vein. As I felt the sting and the cool liquid coursing through my body, I lay down sleepily, looked into her kind eyes and murmured "How could you?" Perhaps because she understood my dogspeak, she said "I'm so sorry." She hugged me, and hurriedly explained it was her job to make sure I went to a better place, where I wouldn't be ignored or abused or abandoned, or have to fend for myself-a place of love and light so very different from this earthly place
Copyright Jim Willis 1999
Excerpted from his book "Pieces of My Heart - Writings Inspired by Animals and Nature"
i found this at funnyjunk.com but it is not at all funny...i have tears rolling down my face. that was so sad...
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Thursday, February 13th, 2003
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Violets are the inspirational visionaries, leaders
and teachers who are here to help save the
planet. Most Violets feel drawn to educate the
masses, to inspire higher ideals, to improve
the quality of life on the planet, or to help
save people, animals and the environment.
What Is Your True Aura Colour?
brought to you by Quizilla
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Sunday, January 26th, 2003
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"Losing Grip"
Are you aware of what you make me feel, baby
Right now I feel invisible to you, like I'm not real
Didn't you feel me lock my arms around you
Why'd you turn away?
Here's what I have to say I was left to cry there,
waiting outside there grinning with a lost stare
That's when I decided
[chorus]
Why should I care
Cuz you weren't there when I was scared I was so alone
You, you need to listen I'm starting to trip,
I'm losing my grip and I'm in this thing alone
Am I just some chick you place beside you to take somebody's place
when you turn around can you recognize my face you used to love me,
you used to hug me
But that wasn't the case
Everything wasn't ok I was left to cry there
waiting outside there grinning with a lost stare
That's when I decided
[chorus]
Crying out loud I'm crying out loud
Crying out loud I'm crying out loud
Open your eyes
Open up wide
Why should I care
Cuz you weren't there
when I was scared I was so alone Why should I care
Cuz you weren't there when I was scared I was so alone
Why should I care
If you don't care then I don't care were not going anywhere
Why should I care cuz you weren't there when I was scared I was so alone
Why should I care If you don't care then i don't care were not going anywhere
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Tuesday, December 17th, 2002
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IM Tools: Personality Test
Your personality score is 35
What does this score mean?
Others see you as sensible, cautious, careful & practical. They see you as clever, gifted, or talented, but modest...Not a person who makes friends too quickly or easily, but someone who's extremely loyal to friends you do make and who expect the same loyalty in return. Those who really get to know you realize it takes a lot to shake your trust in your friends, but equally that it takes you a long time to get over it if that trust is ever broken.
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[ x ] Spell your first name backwards - nonnahs
[ x ] The story behind your livejournal user name - i read it by stephen king and in it the wife of one of the characters had said that he sold nightmares so...sellingnitemares
[ x ] Are you a lesbian - half
[ x ] Where do you live - North Carolina
[ x ] 4 words that sum you up - different, quiet, artistic, and...::shrug::
DESCRIBE YOUR
[ x ] Wallet - i dont really carry one...but the one i have i got from six flags when i was a kid. its got a few pictures in it...and that's about it...
[ x ] Hairbrush - its black with a blue ring around the handle
[ x ] Toothbrush - clear and blue
[ x ] Jewelry worn daily - left arm:9 rubber bracelets, 1 hemp rainbow bracelet, and one cord bracelet...right arm: 1 silver chain...right hand: 4 rings...left hand: 3 rings...2 necklaces...12 earrings...1 belly button ring...
[ x ] Pillow cover - burgundy and blue
[ x ] Blanket - burgundy and blue
[ x ] Coffee cup - white with blue flowers
[ x ] Sunglasses - i got a red pair with silver frames
[ x ] Underwear- what underwear...i dont wear underwear ;) i got a plethora
[ x ] Shoes - blue canvas shoes with blue flame shoelaces
[ x ] Handbag - dont really carry one but the one i got is like a messenger bag with a marilyn manson patch, a blue pin of a girl, a gold pin of a heart and key...a rainbow strap and that's all...
[ x ] Favorite top - anyting that shows the tattoo on my chest or my "i can do everything your last boyfriend couldn't" shirt
[ x ] Cologne/Perfume - cool water
[ x ] CD in stereo right now - a mixed cd
[ x ] Tattoos - 2 for now
[ x ] Piercings - 12 in ears and one belly button...for now
[ x ] What you are wearing now - a gray gizmo shirt with a pair of really really really big blue jeans with a dragon on one leg and chinese writing on the other leg
[ x ] Hair - short
[ x ] Makeup - none
WHO or WHAT (was/is/are)
[ x ] In my mouth - my tongue and teeth
[ x ] In my head - my brain...i think
[ x ] Wishing- my nose wasn't runny
[ x ] After this - download music
[ x ] Talking to - no one
[ x ] Eating - nothing
[ x ] Fetishes - no comment
[ x ] If you could get away with it and murder anyone, who and for what reason - ::shrug::
[ x ] Person you wish you could see right now - danielle or nichole or dolly...or maybe even mea
[ x ] Is next to you - my couch and the other half of the desk
[ x ] Some of your favorite movies - how the grinch stole christmas with jim carrey...foxfire, gia, the truth about cats and dogs, lilo and stitch, hackers, etc etc etc...
[ x ] Something you're looking forward to in the upcoming month - getting my tongue pierced or some other body part
[ x ] The last thing you ate - mashed potatoes
[ x ] Something that you are deathly afraid of - death of loved ones
[ x ] Do you like candles - of course
[ x ] Do you like hot wax - ...
[ x ] Do you like incense - too much gives me a headache and makes my throat hurt...one burnt is good but no more
[ x ] Do you like the taste of blood - ...
[ x ] Do you believe in love - no.........of course
[ x ] Do you believe in soul mates - i believe that there are souls that will always be connected throughout eternity...but its not just one
[ x ] Do you believe in love at first sight - yes
[ x ] Do you believe in Heaven - not really
[ x ] Do you believe in forgiveness - yes
[ x ] Do you believe in God - i believe in the divine spirt(s)
[ x ] What do you want done with your body when you die - cremated with a few sentimental items
[ x ] Who is your worst enemy -myself
[ x ] If you could have any animal for a pet, what would it be - a really big cat...like a tiger or cougar or lion
[ x ] What is the latest you've ever stayed up - i have no idea...throught high school i had insomnia and all my days were one so fucked if i know...
[ x ] Ever been to Belgium - no
[ x ] Can you eat with chopsticks - i used to...dunno now tho
[ x ] What's your favorite coin - anything but a penny
[ x ] What are 5 cities you wouldn't mind relocating to - chicago, new york, shit...i dunno...
[ x ] What are some of your favorite pig out foods - uh...french fries
[ x ] What's something that you wish people would understand - that i honestly mean it when i say i will be there for you WHENEVER they need me, no matter what's going on with me
[ x ] What's something you wish you could understand better - why when someone has something they dont realize it but when it goes away they do
[ x ] Anyone you miss that you haven't seen in a long time - yeah, nichole and dolly
[ x ] What's one thing you want to make happen for tomorrow - anything that is different than my everyday and fun
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Thursday, November 28th, 2002
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| Time: | 8:17 pm. |
| Mood: |  cold. | | Music: | b2k-bump bump bump. |
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so...yeah...i no longer live at home. All my stuff is moved out and tyler has moved into my room. His room has become the spare(guest) bedroom. so...yeah...my dad is unhappy with my mother and misses me. Dunno bout my mom. tyler misses me too of course. he had surgery a couple days ago. he had all his front teeth removed and a bunch of fillings. they put him to sleep to do it. uh...i think that's basically all on the family front.
blow and dale were here earlier. ::makes face:: didn't talk to em or nothing. ::shrugs:: dont care...
my back is killing me. I'm trying like hell to get this one song by R.Kelly but no one has it or the people who do sign off after i get to about a minute of the song. It's driving me nuts. I've been here since like 2 and its 8:30 and i still dont have this song. I'm not leaving till i get it. tomorrow i have to go to nabi and i have to clean the house and finish unpacking my stuff. i've been kinda lazy about it. I also need to go to ecom and see if i can get a job there. definitely need a job. need to put food in the house and get a phone line. plus i would love to get my cell phone turned back on. i have no idea how i'm going to pay my car insurance this month. i could possibly get the money but it depends on other people buying my school books or the ferret. speaking of which amy has not called me back...i hate that...
danielle is in rhode island. she will be going home in about a week. words cannot even express how much i'm going to miss her. There is so much i should have said to her and so much we should have done...so much i wanted to do. i felt like my heart was being ripped out when she called me to say goodbye. i didn't want to let go of her...::sigh:: she will forever hold apart of my heart. yet another person out of my life.......but i'm going to go see her sometime around spring break...at least i hope to.
i'm kinda neglecting sam. but its like so much shit is changing in my life that i can't really concentrate on him. especially with danielle leaving...i'm just trying to cope...but yep yep...
i'ma jet and try to get this damn song some more...
***happy thanksgiving everyone***
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Friday, November 22nd, 2002
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| Time: | 7:24 pm. |
| Mood: |  calm. | | Music: | the sound of my cat eating.... |
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well um...i no longer live at home...i moved out today...i'm here right now only to pick up my cat...this is weird....
lots of shit has changed in the past few days...its insane...
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Sunday, November 17th, 2002
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| Time: | 9:59 pm. |
| Mood: |  drained. | | Music: | jimmy neutron or something my brother was watching. |
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you know...at one time i was a good writer...now i am nothing...and at one time i was a great artist. now i am nothing. at one time i was very spiritual. now i am nothing. i have not wrote in over a year. i have not picked up a pencil to draw in over a year. i have not felt the inner peace and the sprituality that i used to in god knows how long. i feel like a flower that is withering away. i've been ignored. No one has watered me. no one has opened the curtain to allow some light to shine in on me. my beauty is disappearing and i'm dying. i would give anything to go back to the time when i was truly happy on the inside. I pushed so hard for my freedom...and now...i've given myself to so many people that i have nothing left for myself. i'm being sucked dry. i feel so...incomplete. i have no idea how to feel the way i used to. no idea how to regain my beauty and my sanity. i'm lost...
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sellingnitemare's journal
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